Kimmy, My Cumslut

A snow storm keeps a young girl and her father stuck at home together.  An innocent game becomes something more, and a dirty little secret that the girl has been keeping finally comes to light.

Note: This is a story I once released on xnxx.com, slightly modified, but already fully completed.  I'll be releasing new chapters periodically, until all eight chapters are posted.  This is the first story in a planned "universe" that will span many different stories and genres.

If the tags and description do not make it clear, this story is about a man and his young daughter.  If this is not the type of story you like, please do not bother reading it and commenting how much you don't like it.  This story is not for you.

I remember this story before xnxx got stupid with their censorship rules and drove off a lot of good writers.

(posted from the Item Information Page)

I'll take the implied comment, thank you very much. ^_^  As I said in the note for the story, it's already written, but when I posted it originally on xnxx, I noticed a few errors here or there and I wanted to give one more editing pass before I submitted it here.  So as I go through each chapter one last time, I'll post them.

(posted from the Item Information Page)

It took me a whole lot longer to edit this than it really should have, but I finally had a chance to post the last chapters.  There will be more to come from this "universe", with new and interesting characters.  And Kimmy will be back in a later story.

Also, I've been wrestling with the idea of setting up a Patreon to help me be able to write more often.  If anyone would be interested in becoming a Patron (I was only going to start at $1 per month/chapter), message me so I know if there's interest.

Enjoy!

(posted from the Item Information Page)

DoomCock:

Might want to put the bit about Patreon at the bottom of the story description, to make it permanently visible.  If this thread gets active, your notice will disappear from people's view pretty fast.

Just a suggestion, of course.

Eric Storm

PS: to edit the story description, go into the account management section for contributors, and choose the "Edit Item" menu item.

What a wonderful idea!  Done and done!

(posted from the Item Information Page)

What a beautiful story told with so much love and tenderness. I don't know who is better off, Kimmy or Daddy.

(posted from Kimmy)

This is a response to the complete story.
I came to the story because of the two characters and their ages and relationship and those were well portrayed and I liked the first couple of chapters but then for me things changed and I didn’t like the rest as much.
I was glad that daddy admits he’s a paedo, and doesn’t try and shift any blame onto Kimmy for what happens. That was good writing and a nice character enhancement.
The punishment scene was to violent (for me) and as Kimmy said “Daddy you spoilt it.” Yes Kimmy needed punishing and a beating was a nice touch but after that for me daddy came across as a sadistic bully. He professes love for Kimmy but doesn’t show it.
If the intention was to show daddy as a bully then you achieved that perfectly.
I think that Kimmy deserves something better than her daddy.
I thought the story was well crafted and I suppose for me to write this review meant it stirred emotions and that is a good thing.
I know we’re not encouraged to leave negative reviews but I feel if an opinion is heartfelt and reasons for the negativity are given then that is valid commentary.

(posted from the Item Information Page)

mydarkside wrote:

The punishment scene was to violent (for me) and as Kimmy said “Daddy you spoilt it.† Yes Kimmy needed punishing and a beating was a nice touch but after that for me daddy came across as a sadistic bully. He professes love for Kimmy but doesn’t show it.
If the intention was to show daddy as a bully then you achieved that perfectly.

First of all, thank you for your honesty; good, bad or indifferent, any artist worth their salt should appreciate feedback, and I truly do.

Secondly, you nailed it as far as my intention for the daddy character.  It was my intention to portray the inner turmoil of a man who would be dealing with the sexual awakening of their daughter in a VERY unhealthy way.  I did want to portray him as, as you put it, a bully.  To my mind, the majority of men who ACT on these sorts of thoughts and tendencies have to be, in some way, mentally unstable.  So the violent scenes were meant to glimpse at this, while still leaving an out for their to be some tenderness as the MC continues to grapple with his socially inappropriate feelings for his own daughter.

Thanks again!

mydarkside wrote:

I know we’re not encouraged to leave negative reviews but I feel if an opinion is heartfelt and reasons for the negativity are given then that is valid commentary.

Not sure how I missed this back when it was posted.  This is a complete mischaracterization of the attitude here at The Pub.

I have exactly zero problem with "negative reviews", so long as they are presented correctly.  You mostly did this in your review, although you did make one error: you didn't offer a suggested fix.  Your comment that "Kimmy deserves something better than her daddy." is too vague to be useful.

Of course, in this case, we learn from the author that a fix is not necessary, as the thing about which you are complaining was, in fact, his intention, so...  in this case, you're just screwed. 

But seriously: everyone assumes I have a problem with criticism, which is not true.  I just insist that the criticism be constructive.

Eric Storm

I haven't been on this site for some time.  I recently wandered back to look for additional content by one of the other contributors and I stumble across this story. 
I wanted to share with you my view on you how I felt about the story.  First I want to say that I thought the story was well written.  It was an easy read and the structure of the story had a nice flow to it.  So , I enjoyed reading the story. 
The story and plot were a surprise.  As the story built it became clear that the daughter was the character seeking a relationship.  To be honest, I did find that a little hard to swallow with Kimmy being only ten.  Perhaps that was intentional to add a little shock value.  It would have been more believable if Kimmy were a little older. She often came off as a bit too mature for ten.  But then I don't know many ten year old children. I would certainly hope that they were not this mentally aware of their charms. You skillfully portrayed this young girl as a skilled manipulator.  Which is also something I would never expect from a child of ten.
I read one of the other opinions and I have to say I agreed with that opinion in regard to the severe spanking. This part almost killed the story for me. It was at that point I expected the story to take a real hard left somewhere else.
If your intent was to push the reader, it worked. I almost put it down.  I've never been a fan of that. At that point I would have welcomed some kind of severe consequence to the father for going too far. It's like when you say something and then you can't take it back. The damage is done and you can only move forward. And so I continued reading and you brought it back down to earth. I expected the story to take off on this line for a couple of chapters with the father doing damage control for him loosing his cool.
It seems that this story was designed to be continued later.  More chapters could be added and this story has the potential to get very intriguing. But you stopped and nothing more was submitted.  I also noted that you only have the one story, which is disappointing.  It seems that you have a real talent for writing.  Or did you just publish somewhere else.
Either way, I did enjoy the story and am disappointed that this was published years ago and it will not continue. I would have been interested to see where you went with this story when the snow began to melt.  Anyway, well done.

(posted from the Item Information Page)

Not having read the story in question, this is a very generic comment:

Lots of 10yo's are very sexually aware.  I remember, when I was in 5th grade, there were already girls "with reputations".  Whether that was true, or just boys being assholes, there was clearly an awareness there.  My late wife was sexually active before the age of ten (with other children).

And if you don't think 10yo little girls can manipulate their fathers... 

From a writing standpoint, it really is devilishly hard to get the "voice" of a younger child correct, because unless you're currently around someone that age, it's very hard to remember how you thought back then.

Eric Storm

Rearaxle wrote:

I wanted to share with you my view on you how I felt about the story.  First I want to say that I thought the story was well written.  It was an easy read and the structure of the story had a nice flow to it.  So , I enjoyed reading the story.

As I've said in the past, any critique is a welcome critique.  So I appreciate the compliment and you taking the time to provide the feedback.

Rearaxle wrote:

As the story built it became clear that the daughter was the character seeking a relationship.  To be honest, I did find that a little hard to swallow with Kimmy being only ten.  Perhaps that was intentional to add a little shock value.  It would have been more believable if Kimmy were a little older. She often came off as a bit too mature for ten.  But then I don't know many ten year old children. I would certainly hope that they were not this mentally aware of their charms. You skillfully portrayed this young girl as a skilled manipulator.  Which is also something I would never expect from a child of ten.

This was intentional.  While I am not, and can never be a father, I have helped raise 3 nieces of various ages.  And I can tell you that, while not overtly sexual in most cases or situations, that age is rife with the sorts of playfulness I portrayed in the early chapters.  This was meant to be as realistic, to my mind, as a situation like this could be.

Rearaxle wrote:

I read one of the other opinions and I have to say I agreed with that opinion in regard to the severe spanking. This part almost killed the story for me. It was at that point I expected the story to take a real hard left somewhere else.
If your intent was to push the reader, it worked. I almost put it down.  I've never been a fan of that. At that point I would have welcomed some kind of severe consequence to the father for going too far. It's like when you say something and then you can't take it back. The damage is done and you can only move forward. And so I continued reading and you brought it back down to earth. I expected the story to take off on this line for a couple of chapters with the father doing damage control for him loosing his cool.

As I'd said in my response to that referenced comment, this was intentional.  I wanted to avoid "head hopping" in this story as much as I could, so I delved only into the inner thoughts of the daddy here.  But rest assured, no long-term mental damage was caused. 

Rearaxle wrote:

It seems that this story was designed to be continued later.  More chapters could be added and this story has the potential to get very intriguing. But you stopped and nothing more was submitted.  I also noted that you only have the one story, which is disappointing.  It seems that you have a real talent for writing.  Or did you just publish somewhere else.
Either way, I did enjoy the story and am disappointed that this was published years ago and it will not continue. I would have been interested to see where you went with this story when the snow began to melt.  Anyway, well done.

I have every intention of continuing this story, as I had mentioned all those years ago.  I've been quietly working on a few one-offs that have nothing whatsoever to do with these characters, and once I've finally got a working draft, I will start posting those.  But again, thank you for your feedback, your compliments, and your encouragement.  Genuinely, this is what writers look for!

another awesome read, thank you so much

(posted from Kimmy)

good story

(posted from Kimmy)