Seeds of Dissension

Nick was hired to make a delivery.  Someone doesn't want him to finish the job.  He wasn't going to let that happen.

Nice as a short story but it leaves itself open, I think to a good book.

(posted from the Item Information Page)

Great read.  Definitely leaves itself open to expansion.  For some reason my mind's eye created Nick as a young Harrison Ford from a galaxy far far away.

(posted from the Item Information Page)

Thanks guys.

I did leave it open on purpose.  This was originally written for a short story magazine called "The First Line Literary Journal".  Basically they gave me the first sentence and I got to write my own story from that wherever that might go.  With that in mind I had to severely limit the overall length of the story to fit their submission guidelines.

big_black_nemesis:  I do have to admit to taking some inspiration from Han Solo but I hope I put enough of my own character ideas so that Nick doesn't read as a clone.

Thanks for the encouraging words.

Storymaster69 wrote:

Thanks guys.

I did leave it open on purpose.  This was originally written for a short story magazine called "The First Line Literary Journal".  Basically they gave me the first sentence and I got to write my own story from that wherever that might go.  With that in mind I had to severely limit the overall length of the story to fit their submission guidelines.

big_black_nemesis:  I do have to admit to taking some inspiration from Han Solo but I hope I put enough of my own character ideas so that Nick doesn't read as a clone.

Thanks for the encouraging words.

Oh he was distinct enough.  Even with the briefness of the story there was enough there to give him some dimension.  In retrospect, for a really short story its probably useful leaning on a cliche - that much less space consumed by character development.  I'm sure that if you decide to expand the story we'll see many more dimensions to his character.  Just as long as he never utters the words "I hate snakes!" at which point I'll be collecting the shattered pieces of my mind from off the floor.

In any case, an enjoyable quick read.

Very enjoyable SM. But still, a Queen named Candice? Please! Couldn't you have come up with something slightly more believable. You should make a series of it. Nick the delivery guy.

(posted from Chapter 1)

I would love to read more from this universe. I do hope you write some more in this setting.

lol sucks to be this guy    and i agree with jefferson a series of this would be cool

Thanks