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The Secret of Gyre Island
A group of high school students must solve a dark mystery on an island where they live.
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This is very intriguing so far. I like the diary format as an opener... and now I need to move on to the next chapter to see how this diary was discovered and translated, I think/hope. The editing and grammar was very good. I don't read much online anymore, but I have enjoyed this story so far and I hope you continue it and that this message leaves you much encouraged. More people should be reading this and giving an opinion. So says me, and I'm the bar wench... I should know.
(posted from Prologue)
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thank you Black Rose. Corvis and Mandorin helped me alot. Corvis did the editing. I owe them both a lot for all their help.
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Thank you, Triton. You give me too much credit and too little to yourself.
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Nice so far. I like the style of dialogue, and the discriptions. You may wish to at some point consider adding a tiny bit more discription about the beast here, just to further invest your readers. While I'm drawn in to read the next chapter I could be completely addicted.
Good job so far,
The N Storm
(posted from Prologue)
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I'm glad that you liked the prologue of my story. I hope that you like the next 2 chapters too, but I might need to do some work on them to make them better.
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